To read this blog in order start at July right at the top of the blog archive and progress down in order. This is an account of my battle with anorexia and bulimia

Tuesday 19 July 2011

Consumed....the reason behind the name

Linking with Things I can't say for pour your heart out each wednesday and with Twinkle in the Eye for Flash blog fridays
Normally I blog at For the Love but have written a story about my journey with anorexia and hope to gradually have it read and get feedback. So each week will post a bit more.

I chose the name Consumed, because of the meaning of the word. The English Dictionary gives a few meanings, and the two that stuck out the most were possess and destroy. I couldn’t describe an eating disorder any better my self.
So many people suffer from some form of an eating disorder, and it scares me when I see how it is affecting children now of such a young age. It isn’t any body’s fault, but so many people blame themselves if someone close to them is suffering. Often, an eating disorder is a reaction to an event in a person’s life, whether it be emotional, physical, or in the world around them. I found it useful as an escape mechanism.
We go through life experiencing events, and not any one person perceives an event the same way as another person. I wrote this story using my perception of my childhood and my teenage years. For a lot of my teenage years I was consumed by the eating disorder, and I found it hard to get close to anyone. I hated life, and I hated myself. I am saddened to think how much I hurt those around me, especially my mother and my sister (Mim). But unfortunately I couldn’t see that because that is one of the effects of anorexia. Through this story I want people to realise that an eating disorder is extremely destructive.
There are a lot of negative thought patterns throughout the story, which I guess highlight how miserable life is with an eating disorder. A person with an eating disorder is not a pathetic or miserable person, it is the disease that is pathetic and miserable. I can only see that now I have worked through it. I was lucky to have a lot of support, but I was also lucky to get to a point where I believed in the people who were willing to support me. That’s the thing with any disease, nobody can support or help you until you are willing to believe there is a problem. The next step is to believe and trust that these people will see you through it no matter what. Trust is the hardest thing to do, but at times we need to take these steps, or otherwise die (either physically or emotionally).
It is a challenge to get through the disorder, but such an achievement in the end.


  1. Wow, we learned about this disease a bit in a nutrition class I took. But to hear from someone who actually had it is completely different! I'm so glad you were able to over come it!

  2. Such a horrible, horrible disease. I am recovering many years, and as far as I come, I know it would never take much to get me back there -it's such a vicious cycle. Brave of you to speak out.

    1. yes. i am currently dieting as gained 20kg from 4 pregnancy's. but am doing it healthily and my sister is supporting me

  3. So brave to share your journey!

  4. I'm glad that you're sharing your story and I hope other will find encouragement in knowing that it can be beat!

  5. Thank you for sharing your story. Brave girl :-)